Communications problems with coworkers are common—we’ve all experienced them. Solutions to nagging coworker problems can be found in your own desire to create positive change. Keep in mind, many times you are not the only one experiencing the coworker-problem. By addressing the problem, you will be creating positive change for yourself and others.
Here is one example of a person experiencing communications problems with a coworker. Maybe my suggestions to Lynne (not her real name) can help you improve your workplace communications.
Dear Dr. Rick,
I have a problem with a colleague who frequently displays the behavior of a ‘Thinks they know it all’, but with an additional problem. He will use even the most tenuous link to people (frequently myself) or groups/committees to
take other’s credit for himself.
For example, he and I are both in a committee and also I head a team of which he is a member. In both situations, he has claimed credit for things ‘we’ have done in front of others, when it has been work solely done by myself or another committee member.
In this way, he has skillfully misled many people in our workplace into thinking that these achievements are his own. Indeed some staff have even questioned who is in charge of the team because of the things he has
said (and omitted to say) behind my back.
He won’t specifically say ‘he’ did it or that ‘he’ runs the team but he will ‘forget’ to mention anyone else. Give me some ideas on how can I put a stop to this without sounding petty and insecure by pleading “No! That was me. I did that”, which is what I’m thinking. Any suggestions for me?–Lynn
Dear Lynn,
You describe someone who takes undeserved credit for himself. And your issue with it is that you want the credit due you, but you don’t want to appear petty in seeking it. You say you want to put a stop to his behavior, but you haven’t said what you want him to do instead.
Remember, nature hates a vacuum and you cannot replace something with nothing. That makes it more difficult to create positive change for you and for your organization.
If you don’t want him to do what he’s doing, what behavior would you him to replace it with?
That said, I can tell you what I would do in your situation, and it’s up to you what you do from there. I would assume that this person actually believes what he’s saying when he takes undeserved credit. Therefore, I would seize every opportunity to help educate him about the role he actually played vs. the one he thinks he played by drawing him out and asking him for specifics about his contributions. My guess is he’ll hate this. My guess is, by the time I’d done this on several incidents, he’d be well trained, and he’d stop doing anything that might cause me to ask such embarrassing and revealing questions again.
For example, when he claims credit for things ‘we’ have done in front of others, I’d be inclined, gently, not accusingly, to say, “I hear you say that ‘we’ did that. Honestly, I have a different recollection. Clearly I’ve overlooked some important details about your specific participation. Please help me. Tell me, what specifically did you do that you’re referring to when you say ‘we’ did this?” And then I’d smile graciously, and patiently wait for an answer. And no matter what the answer was, I’d keep asking questions that went from general to specific.
He says, “Well, remember, we got that list and made those calls?” “When you say ‘we got that list,’ please help me recall, because I just have a different recollection. What specific part did you play in getting that list?’ Or, I might tell him how I remember it, and ask him to help me with the parts I’m missing. “You know, the way I remember it, I called my staff, had them solicit input from their clients, then took the results and created the list myself. Then I made the calls. I’ve obviously over looked something. Tell me exactly what you did that helped put together that list? And who specifically did you personally call?” Once I revealed the details or lack thereof in this way, I’d summarize what I heard, and thank him for helping me out. “So, ok, my memory was accurate. I put together the list, and I made the calls. Hey, thanks for helping me remember this accurately. Great job!”
Now, you’re concerned with looking petty. But it’s my guess that you’re not the only one annoyed by this person’s behavior. So calling him out through innocent questions and positive communications might actually be considered as an added service by others who work with him. And if you have some fun with this, I think it could be a very effective communications approach.
You do have other communications options. Another option would be to do all of this with him in private the first time or two. “Back in the meeting, when you said that ‘we’ did such and such,….” Then, the next time it happens and you call him out in public, he won’t be so surprised, but he will recognize the patterning of it.
Last bit. I think this person is pretty desperate for attention. So maybe he’s not getting any when he deserves some. If that’s the case, maybe it would serve you well to pay attention more closely for legitimate opportunities to recognize his contributions. Tell him specifically what he did right and recognize him for it.
This two fold strategy of calling him out when it isn’t due through innocent questions for details, and giving him credit when it’s due for specific actions taken, may be enough to change the way this individual pursues his efforts to make (or be seen to make) a meaningful positive change.
Does anyone have examples of other solutions that work with coworkers taking credit for others’ work?
Be well,
Dr. Rick
Related posts:
1. How To Develop An Assertive Style: Office Politics
2. The Art of Communication: How To Bring Out The Best In People At Their Worst!
{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
I am actually dealing with a very similar situation myself and have been looking for solutions – the communication suggestions above sound great – although I believe the one doing this to me knows what he is doing so I don’t think this would work.
Primarily in my office we work on PPT presentations, and I will spend hours researching to make sure I do my project right, and I do get complimented a lot on what I do vs. what other’s in my position do.
When I first began at this job (almost 8 months ago) an employee went into a finished product of mine and put their name on a slide in the middle of my product (without having changed anything – I spent lots of time checking on that to make sure) in order to claim some credit for the entire project. I would never have even considered doing that to someone else. I was infuriated since I spent a lot of hard earned time on the project, and instead of going through the process of a messy confrontation I moved my working files into a drive only I have access to until the final is sent, and then I will place it back in the ‘all-access’ drive, and assumed I had quenched that issue before it could escalate.
Recently I noticed a project I had done, and in fact been highly complimented on, was meant to be included in this other individual’s latest project. Now instead of taking the completed project, I did, and just attaching it (as most would), this individual re-created them, with the same points I used and slightly different layout and of course claims credit. Since, of course, yes he did do the slides LITERALLY (although the work was mine) I don’t believe there is anything I can do about it. Since I have seen this behaviour before in him, I am well aware that it was a chance for him to imply it was all in this case ‘discovered’ by him, and show what a good job he is doing. While I don’t be-grudge him his pat on the back – I do begrudge the effort I had to put into it to originally, for him to just ‘recreate’ and nearly plagerize.
I know for a fact this individual is upset that I get more compliments it’s written all over his face when he speaks to me – but I also work harder and put alot of effort into it – and because I am aware of this I do work hard to compliment his work and point out when someone acknowledges his work. I will ask his opinion on things, so that I will boost his confidence and I also send (email) tid-bits of info. that I have learned along that way that helps me to do my job better (BTW I send these to ALL that are in my position so it doesn’t look as though I am singling anyone out), and of course these things are not recipricated, and usually go un-responded to and in most cases he doesn’t use them to improve himself. I have no problem with him ignoring them, etc…however when I give someone the tools they need to accomplish the same kind of work that I do and they refuse to use it to better themselves, and would rather chose to ‘slip’ their name in on my hard work – I call that laziness. My mother call’s it ‘Dick’ Envy.
What I have done so far about this situation, since I am a contractor, and my actual employer is in another state, I spoke to a senior employee onsite about the situation. I also made sure to state I did not want this discussed with other employees, I am not attempting to create an issue or make my life worse by sitting next to an angry co-worker for me calling them out on their behaviour. I asked what they suggest I do to be able to handle the situation on my own, without offense or getting this individual into trouble. Although, I do think there is very little if anything that can be done to correct the problem.
I haven’t recieved a response yet, but if there are any suggestions as to how I can handle this situation I’d love to hear them. I think I have been about as tactful I can be so far, and am at the point where I am afraid I will flip out next time this happens. I have even tried looking to it as a compliment that someone is willing to try to take credit for my work – because it is good, but its very infuriating to know I spent TIME (weeks) while they spend two minutes to try to include themselves, so they can get some ‘glory’.
My best advice would be to
1. Contact your managers/superiors and let them know of the situation and inform them of your intent to confront the person in question. By doing so you give the perception of a person who is handling an uncomfortable situation in a tactful professional manner.
2. Comfront the co-worker in question with your concerns. If he/she reacts negatively towards your actionsa, any further attempts to discredit your work, will be seen by youyr superiors as an act of malice.
Good suggestions from Deano, thanks for the comment!
As I read through what’s happened to you, Melissa, I can’t help but think that my advice above still holds. Call it out when someone takes credit for what they haven’t done, and find opportunities to give credit where it’s due. In the case of rewriting your slides, I would have actually exlaimed out loud, “Wow, what are the chances! Other than a different background and font, the text and bullets on your slides look identical to the slides I developed for the presentation I gave on such and such a date! When you see them side by side, it will be soooo obvious to you how alike they are! Amazing, huh? I’m curious, how did you do that without referencing my slides?” My guess is that the potential embarrassment will have the desired side effect of making this person think twice about ever doing such a thing again! The alternative, sitting silently and letting him get away with it, just means he’ll do it again (and again, until he gets called out for it!)
best wishes
Rick